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I think this is other of the effects of growing up. One day you feel happy; you have your friends, your family and everithing organized. The problem is when you start to be absent and just after one week of absence you realize that your friends aren´t the same they just changed... There´s when you start to feel strange, they talk about other topics and you´re just a strange person in the group. Personally i have had that experience some few times there´s when you think you must not be there that you´re a lot diferent and in my special case i feel sad, sad that everething changed except myself and i know that this may be wrong but i always live in the past; i think that past times were more mindhealthy(If that word exists) and when one lives the greatest and more happy experiences in it´s life; just as: Your first best friend, your first pijama party, your first love...An talking of love in this moment my heart is a tieme bomb i know that all of you know (Ok, i´ll guess) how fatal you feel when you can´t tell someone what do you feel for her, you feel like chained with a great weight in your heart, yes... you feel your heart heavy just because you´re afraid that person will not feel the same what you feel for her. Here´s also one thing that makes me feel stupid... My brain has understanded that if that person doesn´t feels anything for me i don´t have to worry, she is not the one, but my heart... i don´t think my heart can understand that... that´s the most noble of all the organs, the one used to love, and as we know, love is a weapon with a double edge, it can make you happy but it also can make you feel the unhappiest person in the world. In my case, i don´t know when is the next time i will see that person that i love but when i see her, i would like to tell her. I wish i didn´t bored you with this post but as everithing here is like my journal and i this is nothing more than a page when i explain how i feel...